Oddities

Comfort Level

Seoul's city authorities received many complaints about taxi drivers who were rude and whose driving scared the living daylights out of passengers. So they set up a complaint hotline. Now taxis carry a notice on the inside advising passengers of this facility called "Intercourse Discomfort Report Center."

Tootle With Vigor

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: "When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor."

Compassion

Spoken Turkish offers this cool exchange between two observers to a car crash: "The poor people are covered with blood. I wonder if they're suffering much?" Answer: "I don't think so, since they've fainted."

Crazy Finance

Full Explanation: The governor of Malaysia's central bank, Jaffar Hussein, resigned after announcing that the bank had lost 5.7 billion ringgit [$2.1 billion] by speculating in derivatives. This loss exceeded the central bank's entire capital and reserves. "Errors were made," Hussein declared.
Fuller Explanation: Fugitive developer Juergen Schneider borrowed $3 billion and went bankrupt. "Errors were unquestionably made," Deutsche Bank Chairman Hilmar Kopper declared.

Learning Curve

The New York City Board of Education maintains 6,000 bureaucrats to run its central office. The Archdiocese of New York requires a staff of 26 to serve about a fifth as many pupils.

Business Directory

Argue & Phibbs, Solicitors [Albert Street, Sligo, Ireland]
Brigadier Attack, Ministry Of Defence [Director of Army Management Services, Civil Services]
Cheatham & Steele, Bankers [Wallowa County, Oregon]
Climax Underwear Co. [Cincinnati, Ohio]
Dr. Croaker, Pathologist [University Of Florida School of Medicine]
Doolittle & Dalley, Estate Agents [Kidderminster, England]
Dr. Dotti, Psychiatrist [Rome, Italy]
Mr. Forecast, Assistant Director [Social Statistics, UK Civil Service]
W. T. Odor, Plumber [Corpus Christi, Texas]
Dr. Zoltan Ovary, Gynecologist [New York Hospital]

Correcter Than Thou

Rejecting subsidized student tickets to Romeo and Juliet, headmistress Jane Brown of the Kingsmead Primary School in Hackney, East London, excoriated the play as "entirely about heterosexual love."

Modester Than Thou

A sign at an African mammal exhibit in Washington's Smithsonian Museum apologizes for giving the impression that humans are "more important" than other animals.